You’ve likely seen the image, you know the one right?! with the very long surgical scar on mama’s belly from the top of mum’s stomach down to her pubic bone? let me show you.
This amazing mama tells her story like this:
“A new day and a what seems to be another new post from someone insinuating that giving birth by cesarean means that you didn’t give birth.
Can we please just stop!
I obviously can’t change people’s views but I’ve decided to post this picture to see if it may make people understand that despite what our birth plans might say. Sometimes we don’t get a choice. I didn’t get a choice.
I had a fibroid the size of a melon sat on my cervix and a low lying placenta which meant that I’ve been left with no ordinary csection scar. But whether you believe this or not. I gave birth to my baby. .
So next time you judge someone for not doing what you consider to be “giving birth” please take a minute to think about why they may have had to deliver that way. Think about the fact that given the choice they probably wouldn’t of chosen this but had no choice. Why would you choose a major operation and 6 weeks of recovery?
This scar saved me from losing a life threatening amount of blood and meant my baby was brought into this world as she should be. Healthy and unharmed, as was I.” -Jodie Shaw
I’ve delivered babies both by caesarian AND vaginally. They’re both a lot of work in many different ways. Whenever I hear anyone say that caesarian birth is lazy or caesarian mums are ‘too posh to push’ I get FURIOUS! NO ONE would choose that 6 weeks recovery if they had a choice, NO ONE believes that it’s easier to deliver by caesarian than by “natural” methods. To even begin to think that you are in some way superior because you pushed your baby out of your vagina and another mother had to have MAJOR abdominal surgery to deliver her baby is ridiculous!
Do you even KNOW what goes in to having a caesarian delivery? do you even realise how much longer the recovery takes? How sometimes that delivery can leave you unable to bond easily with your child because the surgery was possibly an emergency and your body and mind is in shock and unable to process what you have just been through? how sometimes the mother has been labouring for DAYS and trying her damned hardest to push out that baby but the baby was unable to be delivered for some reason?
My first caesarian was NOT by choice. I’ve NEVER gone into labour naturally, EVER! And I am a mother to SIX children. Oh I tried to go into labour, I have tried every damn thing imaginable, curries, sex, bumpy roads, long long walks, teas and tinctures, oils and massage but nothing puts me into labour. I went to 42 weeks with one of my children and he was born with almost no amniotic fluid in the uterus and was sickly when he was delivered because of it.
You think birth is easy because baby was cut out? it’s not. In fact from all of my deliveries (4 vaginal and 2 caesarian) Let me tell you, VAGINAL IS EASIER! oh yes! it’s easier alright, once that baby is out it’s over. Sure you might of had a couple of stitches or a graze but it’s done, you can walk directly after for your shower, you can sit (tenderly and tentatively) afterwards but it’s done. I’d take a natural delivery over a caesar any day!
Of the two caesarians I had, 1 was an emergency and the other was elective. Elective because I KNEW this baby was big (my last babe was almost 10lbs and this was the same) and I didn’t want another baby stuck and unable to be delivered because he was so large. My emergency caesar left me in mental shock for 10 days afterwards, I was in a daze, I was unable to think, I cried spontaneously, my milk took it’s time to come, and baby was bruised from the pushing I did before he was ultimately taken out through surgery.
In summary (sorry for the unusually long post) can we just quit the judging of other mothers because of how their babies came out of the womb? honestly – we are ALL warriors for carrying these heavy burdens for so many months and bringing them into the world.